Sort of Confession

Those who know me longer know I drink quite a lot, I know they joke about it, often in front of me. I try to laugh it off, but yeah, they’re right. It’s just that sometimes it’s the only thing that numbs the pain or anxiety. And then there are entire weeks when I pretty much don’t drink at all and I don’t even feel the need to. And then there are days between, when I do pretty ok, yet I still feel like I need some safety blanket, because I can never know when things get bad again and I can’t sleep and I feel like I’ll jump out of my skin and it’s overwhelming. And there is a choice how to cope, I hurt myself or I drink. Or I take a pill to calm down, pill that can very easily be addictive. Not much of a good choices, I know, especially when alcohol can give me one hell of a migraine.

2012-06-14-Unease

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